Surnames are important to us. We are admonished, as children, to "remember who you are" and not to disgrace our family's name. If you are blessed with an unusual surname, you instinctively know that, should you get into trouble, everyone is likely to know who your parents are. And those same people spell their surname as a matter of course after pronouncing it. Women tend to think of the combination of a number of surnames with her given name when contemplating marriage. When a baby is born, given names are carefully weighed in relationship to the child's surname. Even acronyms need to be considered. When we embark on the search for our family history, it is our own surname that we tend to follow first.
There are other reasons besides pride that makes us want to find the history of our surname first. It is much easier to follow the surname of a man, which seldom changes entirely, than that of a woman, who changes her surname with each marriage. In fact, some so-called family histories have been written in which the only surname followed is that of the males. Or perhaps we have the same surname as a famous person in history and want to connect to the same lineage.
Because the surnames of women can change, we should always refer to females by their maiden name, or the name they were given at birth or christening. The only exception to this is when a child is adopted, but then this holds true for male children as well...
Read More